Wednesday, December 8, 2021

fink

Lindsey Graham to Defend Trump in ‘Honor Duel’ With Marianne Williamson

Washington D.C. -- Following comments made by Democratic candidate for President Marianne Williamson that Donald Trump represented a "dark psychic force of the collectivized hatred," Senator Lindsey Graham announced that he challenged her to a "duel to the death"...

Future Active Shooter Disappointed About His C- Manifesto Grade

Clovis, CA -- Future active shooter and area incel Garth Gall spent the latter half of the day sulking after he received a C- minus on his manifesto entitled "Rotting From the Inside Out: Make America Great Again." Mr....

Kim Jong-un Purchases Michael Jordan

Pyongyang, North Korea -- The Official new agency of the DPRK announced yesterday that the North Korea government had reached a tentative deal to purchase American basketball legend, Michael Jordan. The deal, which is rumored at 90 million dollars,...

Trump Calls NBC Journalist A ‘Libtard’

Washington D.C. -- Activists took to social media over the weekend calling on Twitter to ban President Trump after he referred to NBC's Meet the Press anchor Chuck Todd as a "libtard." The tweet, which was posted in the...

Government Now Using Stealth Drones for Chemtrail Operations

Washington, D.C. -- In a surprise executive order, the Trump Administration announced on Friday that it plans to license and deploy aerial drones to conduct Chemtrail spraying operations. In a lengthy 97 page document, the Administration went into great...

Alabama Supreme Court Rules God is Real-All Citizens Must Obey

Montgomery, AL -- The Alabama Supreme Court ruled 8-1 in favor that God is real and that the citizens of the conservative state must follow, in the words of the ruling, "the Lord's literal and explicit words in the...

Low IQ Man Can’t Handle The Hectic Pace of California

Twin Falls, ID -- Former California resident Harley Barton gave up on his golden state dreams and moved his family to Twin Falls, Idaho late last year. Citing the cost of living and the 'flatlanders' moving around his Yreka...

Man Falls Off Forest Hill Bridge After Accidentally Shooting Himself While on Heroin

Sacramento, CA -- A Mokelumne Hill man is in critical but stable condition after falling from the Forest Hill bridge in what appears to be a failed suicide attempt. Robert Allen was checked into UC Davis Medical Center in...

Home Depot Sponsors 129 Miles of Trump’s Border Wall

Atlanta, GA -- The world's largest home improvement retailer announced today that it plans on sponsoring up to 129 miles of President Trump's border wall. Home Depot, known for its labyrinth-like shopping experience and employees who avoid eye-contact says...

Family Cited For Viking Funeral on Area Lake

CASCADE SHORES, CA -- A local family from the Cascade Shores housing development is in hot water for attempting to cremate a deceased relative on Scotts Flat Lake earlier today. The Barstad family recently suffered the loss of the...

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Fink is a man of many words, and many web links. He likes to argue, and seldom loses. Mostly because he's well informed. And somewhat gassy
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Biden Sells White House Naming Rights to Soros, Inc for $666 Trillion

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- President Joe Biden signed an agreement today that authorizes a name change to the historic residence...
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