Wednesday, March 3, 2021

“Cat Lawyer” Added to Trump’s Shortlist of New Legal Team

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Rumors are spreading wildly as it seems Trump is moving forward with firing his second legal team while also hiring "Cat Lawyer,"...
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Devastated Underage Dominican Prostitutes Left Out Of Limbaugh’s Will

SANTO DOMINGO, DOMINICAN REPUBLIC -- In a shocking blow to the country, it is rumored that Rush Limbaugh's will left out his favorite Dominican...

Florida Drug Dealer Faces Financial Hardships

PALM BEACH, FLORIDA -- Ronald Crabtree, a low level Oxycontin street dealer, sits in a second hand LazyBoy recliner, shuffling through a Rolodex. "This one...

Rich Guy Taking Six Figure Paycheck From Taxpayers Wonders If Taxpayers Need More Stimulus

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Sen. Ron Penis (Q-WI) told his colleagues on both sides of the aisle today that he's not sure anybody in America...

Robinhood Files Paperwork to Change Its Name to “SheriffofNottingham.”

SWILLY CORN, VALLEY -- Online brokerage trader Robinhood filed emergency paperwork with the Securities and Exchange Commission today, requesting an immediate change of their...

Closest McDonald’s Franchise to the White House Files Bankruptcy

CAPITOL HILL --  McDonald's general manager, Richard Reid, says with the former president leaving the White House, the restaurants future looks bleak. "He was our...

Instead of a Library, Trump Wants to Open a Presidential Hooters Franchise

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Most of the modern presidents have, upon leaving office, opened a presidential library where they house artifacts and important documents from...

Ivanka Assures Rudy Her Daddy ‘Can’t Stiff Anyone For Too Long’

Reports are starting to circulate that President Donald Trump, who has less than a week left to occupy the White House, has directed this...

Ivanka Doesn’t Think She Should Have to Sleep Her Way to the Top of the Trump Organization Again

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- People in her orbit are telling media sources that First Lady Ivanka Trump is panicked and quite unhappy about the fact...

Trump Starting New Social Media Company With Ivanka

WASHINGTON. D.C. -- Reportedly, outgoing, one-term, permanently impeached, lame duck, never won the popular vote, President Donald J. Trump was absolutely livid when Twitter...

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