Saturday, January 22, 2022

Food and Dining

Golden Corral Taps Tucker Carlson to Promote “Patriot Binge and Purge” Loyalty Program

This week, Fox News will begin airing a docuseries produced by noted white nationalist trust fund baby Tucker Carlson entitled, Patriot Purge. In the docuseries, which is already garnering enormous backlash, Carlson advances the narrative that the events on January 6th,...

Trump Left Behind Unpaid $1 Million McDonald’s Tab for Biden Administration

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Presidential transitions take time, and as such, it can be months into a new administration when the public is made aware of something the last one did, or in some case did not, do. One such...

Biden to Dismantle McDonald’s Kitchen the Previous Administration Installed

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The permanent staff of the White House is a professional unit of workers who is quite used to a change in power resulting in a change of decor. When one president leaves and another enters, the...

QAnon Shaman Won’t Eat Unless Its Organic or Trump’s Ass

While in federal custody, Jacob Chansley -- known worldwide now as "The QAnon Shaman" -- will only eat either organic food, or barring that, Trump's ass. Mr. Chansley, who has made himself famous by showing up to various QAnon events...

Mob Storms Local Taco Bell Demanding Mexican Pizzas

FORT PHARDT, INDIANA -- An angry, maksed mob appeared at a local Taco Bell this week and demanded scores of Mexican Pizzas, which will be leaving the Taco Bell menu for good in a matter of weeks. MORE: CDC Releases...

White Woman Already Sh***ing Pure Pumpkin Spice

The calendar has just barely turned over into September, but 35 year old Katherine Braun has been eating and drinking pumpkin spice flavored products since the first official day of fall, back in September. In fact, with just a...

McDonald’s Unveils New “McF#ckIt” Burger For Customers Who Just Don’t Care Anymore

OAK BROOK, ILLINOIS -- Fast food monolith McDonald's told investors today that a brand new burger will be added to most menus worldwide starting in the third quarter of 2018. The "McFuckIt" burger will be the largest burger in...

Trump Buys 100 Salads For Winning Women’s College Basketball Team

Washington, D.C. -- The Syracuse Women's Basketball team were stunned this past week after President Donald Trump served them salads at a White House event. The President insisted on purchasing 100 pre-packaged salads from area McDonald's to prove that...

Mexico Offers to Pay Furloughed U.S. Workers’ Salaries

MEXICO CITY, MEXICO - -The President of Mexico has officially offered to step in and pay the salaries of furloughed employees of the U.S. government. "It's becoming increasingly apparent that the President of the United State's tantrum will continue indefinitely,...

Disneyland to Introduce First, Second, and Steerage Class Tickets in 2020

ANASLIME, CALIFORNIA -- When Disney announced that they would be dramatically raising Disneyland ticket pricing this year, a strong negative buzz began to foment on social media. Quizzically, though, the entertainment behemoth announced today that next year's ticket plans...
- Advertisement -spot_img

Latest News

Matt Walsh is Thinking Very Deeply About Your Genitals. Just Like Jesus.

This week, Daily Caller columnist and podcaster Matt Walsh -- a devout evangelical Christian conservative -- appeared on The Dr. Phil...
- Advertisement -spot_img