Man: “You’re Voting for the Wrong Person You Fucking Idiot”

The following is an editorial opinion piece written by Dick Whistler, a local man ...

Enormous Rug and 51 Brooms Delivered to Senate Chamber

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Sources close to the situation are reporting that an enormous rug ...

Trump Orders Space Force to Investigate Allegations of Biden’s Neptune-ism

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Though it’s officially a branch of the U.S. Armed Forces, President ...

Trump Explains Yovanovitch Tape: He Meant “Take Her Out” for Hamberders and Covfefe

WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald Trump has yet another potential scandal brewing involving former ...

McConnell Opens Senate Impeachment Trial With Traditional Burning of the Constitution

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Today, the impeachment trial of President Donald John Trump began its ...

Barack Obama and Merrick Garland Not Buying Mitch McConnell’s Bullshit

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Former President Barack Obama and Federal Judge Merrick Garland have released ...

Country’s Biggest Shit Wants Nationwide Toilet Probe

WASHINGTON, D.C. — The biggest, smelliest, and dumbest fecal-human hybrid in the country wants ...