Sunday, September 19, 2021

After Meghan and Harry’s Interview, Stephen Miller Wants to Work For the Crown

Stephen Miller, the former Senior White House Balding and Racist Cuntery Adviser, is rumored to be shopping his CV to some pretty famous and powerful people. Since his former boss was voted out of office after a single, twice-impeached term, Miller has found himself in need of employment, though there are rumors that he’s glad the Biden administration’s new stimulus package looks to be a forgone conclusion, in case he and his wife and future fascist crotch-fruit need some extra money soon. Word is that Miller has sent his employment history and resumé to several autocratic dictators, seeking to leverage his work experience in the Trump administration into a similar position elsewhere.

This morning, a new rumor hit the Hill — Miller is desperate for a job interview with the British monarchy.

MORE: TOM COTTON SAYS DEMOCRAT VOTES SHOULD ONLY BE WORTH THREE-FIFTHS OF REPUBLICAN VOTES

“Of course, MAGA Nation would have been absolutely appalled just a few weeks ago to find out he was even considering working for the royals,” one source close to Miller told us. “However, once that interview Harry and Meghan did with Oprah came out, and once Stephen heard Meghan accuse some in the family of being racist about her son’s skin tone, Stephen started emailing copies of his resumé to anyone who might have contact with the Crown right away.”

If Miller were to land a gig with the British monarchy, it would end his search for new employment on a positive note. As we reported a few weeks back, Miller was all set to work for the KKK, but was devastated to not be able to take the job, once he saw what the klan’s benefits package actually looked like.

“Stephen was absolutely heartbroken and devastated to find out that the Klan doesn’t, at this time, offer either a 401k package, or employer-sponsored healthcare,” our source told us. “Both of those things were really important to Stephen. He’s most definitely not happy about having to use the Obamacare exchanges to find himself health insurance.” (NRN)

Thus far, the royal family has not responded to Miller’s request for a job interview.

ALSO: SCIENTISTS DEVELOPING COVID VACCINE THAT WILL ALSO SHUT MEGHAN MCCAIN THE FUCK UP


 

Like what you read? Consider signing up for my free newsletter, becoming a paid Facebook subscriber.

If you want my satire completely ad-free, just sign up for my Patreon at any level.

Writer/comedian James Schlarmann is the founder of The Political Garbage Chute and his work has been featured on The Huffington Post. You can follow James on Facebook, Spotify, and Instagram, but not Twitter because Twitter is a cesspool.