Wednesday, April 21, 2021

Report: Nobody Cares What This Tubby Shitdick Thinks About the Pandemic He Downplayed Anymore

Apparently, the most recently vacated occupant of the Oval Office was extremely upset and unnerved by interviews Doctors Anthony Fauci and Deborah Birx gave...

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Biden Thanks Trump for Nearly Spelling ‘Vaccine’ Right on Operation Warp Speed Documents

"I suppose it could've been a lot worse if the scientists hadn't known what he meant by 'VACKSEEN.'"

An Excerpt from Trump’s Post-Presidential Diary

"The only real difference is I don’t have my beautiful Twitter account."

Texas Gov. Signs Bill Requiring Texans to Remove Their Masks and Tongue Kiss a Covid Patient

The law also contains a provision that forces Democrats to get "666" tattoos from unmasked, covid positive tattoo artists.

Experts Say Arkansas Abortion Ban Could Mean State Sees 100,000% Increase in Cousin-Siblings

"A scenario that forces every pregnancy to full-term could cause the incestual American population in the state to absolutely, positively explode."

Poll: 90% of Americans Support Inventing Time Travel to Convince Ted Cruz’s Mom to Be Pro-Choice

"In this country, you can't get this kind of agreement on the wetness of water."

Trump to Spend Romantic International Women’s Day With The Woman He Loves Most

"If you thought the spread at the Clemson ceremony was impressive, just you wait until you see what he’s got in store for Ivanka."

After Meghan and Harry’s Interview, Stephen Miller Wants to Work For the Crown

"Stephen started emailing copies of his resumé to anyone who might have contact with the Crown right away."

Tom Cotton Says Democrat Votes Should Only Be Worth Three-Fifths of Republican Votes

The panic seems to have set in with Republicans because throughout the states.

Gaetz Plans to Fuck a Mrs. Potato Head While Reading Racist Dr. Seuss Books to Own the Libs

He's had it up to here with cancel culture, and Matt Gaetz is going to do the only thing he knows how in order to stop it: embarrassing himself.

House Republicans Urging States to Rush Kids Back Into Potential School Shootings

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The country cannot afford to keep kids out of potential school shooting situations any longer, according to a growing chorus of...

Biden Directs Space Force to Stop Its ‘McDonald’s on the Moon’ Program

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Space Force will no longer be developing a plan to install a McDonald's fast food franchise on Earth's moon. This new...

Pat Robertson Says God Will Send Hurricanes to All 50 States If ‘Gays Keep Getting Married’

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA -- Televangelist Pat Robertson has an ominous warning for America: Stop letting the gays get married, or else God will flood...