It’s still about three years away, but the 2024 presidential election has already gotten its first official entrants — Congressman Matt Gaetz and Alabama judge Roy Moore. Today, Gaetz and Moore filed papers to put their hats in the ring and declare themselves as candidates for the White House. As of now, the plan is for the older Moore to be the presidential candidate, and Mr. Gaetz would serve as his Vice President.
“The other night, Roy called me to give me a pep talk, and tell me he didn’t think it was any big deal if a full-grown, middle-aged man gets down with teenage girls,” Gaetz explained on Newsmax TV this morning. “After we started talking about cancel culture and the woke mob, we realized that we have so much in common, we’d make one hell of a good presidential ticket.”
Moore, appearing on OAN, told host Jack “Rape Melania” Posobiec that he was “just blown away” by closely bonded to Rep. Gaetz he already feels.
“Matt and I just agree on so many things. Taxes. Immigration,” Moore listed, “and lowering the age of consent to whatever it needs to be to sidestep state and federal sex trafficking charges. So much in common, fam!”
Asked why they’re announcing their ticket so long before the election cycle begins, Gaetz smiled and laughed, and then winked.
“You know us; we like to get in there as early as possible,” Gaetz said coyly.
It’s been a busy last few days for Congressman Gaetz. While his name has been in headlines for some things he may not be too happy about, Gaetz has also had some things turn his way. Such as delivering a commencement address to this year’s graduating class from Trump High School. We reported on that story just days ago.
“HI, I’M MATT GAETZ AND I AM LITERALLY INCAPABLE OF SPEAKING IN AN INSIDE VOICE,” Gaetz told the hosts of Newsmax TV’s morning show. “I AM REALLY EXCITED ANNOUNCE THAT I WILL BE GIVING THE COMMENCEMENT ADDRESS AT TRUMP HIGH SCHOOL’S GRADUATION CEREMONY IN JUNE! I AM GLAD TO KNOW THAT MY UNDYING FEALTY TO A REALITY-TV GAME SHOW HOST AND TAX CHEAT WILL CONTINUE TO PAY OFF FOR ME SO BIGLY!” (NRN)
It’s unclear at this time how former President Donald Trump will take the news, however, that Gaetz and Moore are already in for 2024. There had been wide speculation that the former commander in chief would be quite keen on a rematch with Joe Biden. Now, with Gaetz potentially playing spoiler, it’s unclear what Trump’s next move will be.
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Writer/comedian James Schlarmann is the founder of The Political Garbage Chute and his work has been featured on The Huffington Post. You can follow James on Facebook, Spotify, and Instagram, but not Twitter because Twitter is a cesspool.