Tuesday, May 30, 2023

farts

Man Is ‘Blown Away’ How Much ‘It Stinks’ That His Girlfriend Can’t Stop Farting During Quarantine

BROWN CLOUD, CALIFORNIA -- He says that there is "absolutely no chance" of it breaking them up, but that doesn't mean 37 year old Tad Toddley is thrilled that his girlfriend, 34 year old Kelly Olsen, has been "farting...

Trump Says That He Misses Blaming His Farts on Sarah Huckabee Sanders

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Sister publication The Political Garbage Chute reported last week that recent a recent staff departure has him feeling blue. While turnover has always been high in any endeavor led by Mr. Trump, he says that this...

Man Invents Device for Translating Farts and Donald Trump

EDISON FALLS, IDAHO -- Nicholas Tesler describes himself as an "amateur tinkerer" and he says he enjoys coming up with new inventions, even if they never go to market. Mr. Tesler recently contacted us because he believes he's invented...

Amazon Working On Rectal Recognition Software So You Always Know Who Dealt It

//pagead2.googlesyndication.com/pagead/js/adsbygoogle.js (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || ).push({}); SEATTLE, WASHINGTON -- Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos announced today that his company has begun developing a new technology, based on their facial recognition software Amazon is already developing, that he says could "help bring permanent...

Man Doesn’t Deny He Dealt It, But Callously Refuses To Smellt It

RUSTY WIND FALLS, MINNESOTA -- Everyone in the room knew he did it, Bob Phalinger didn't deny he did it. The blame for the malodorous emission from his posterior was not in doubt, ever, during the entire incident at 329...
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God Apologizes For Not Telling Everyone About His Great Replacement Project Sooner

After a white supremacist gunman's killing spree in Buffalo, New York over the weekend revealed the shooter's manifesto included...
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