Sunday, September 25, 2022

insurrection

History: One Year Ago, a President Suffered Humiliating Insurrectile Dysfunction

In American history, there are many dates that carry more importance than others. July 4th, December 7th, and September 11th are some of the most famous and infamous. Last year, exactly one year ago, January 6th joined those dates...

Boebert Thought Planning Trump’s Insurrection Just Meant ‘Giving Boners to Some Dirty MAGAs’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Responding to a new bombshell report in Rolling Stone that indicates she participated in a plot to overturn last year's election, freshman Congresswoman Lauren Boebert (Q-CO) tried to bat away, deflect, and downplay the implications of the article. "Yeah,...

Coroner Updates Ashli Babbitt’s Cause of Death to ‘Believing a Moron’s Bullshit Too Much’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The coroner tasked with determining the cause of death for Ashli Babbitt -- the domestic terrorist shot and killed while attempting to breach the capitol on January 6th, 2021 -- has updated their findings of determination....

Manchin: “We Should Find Common Ground With Terrorists Who Think We’re Pedophile Vampires”

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This weekend, alleged Democrat Sen. Joe Manchin of West Virginia threw cold water on his party's attempt to pass the most sweeping voting reforms this country has seen in generations. Not only is he against ending...

Trump Tells Maria Bartiromo He Still Hasn’t Accepted Results of Election or Insurrection

In a new interview with Fox News host Maria Bartiromo, former President Donald John Mushroom Sized Dong Trump said he still has yet to reconcile with the fact that he lost the election and an attempted coup. Trump, by...

Ron Johnson: “I Shouldn’t Have to Take My Hood and Robes Off to Prove I’m not Racist!”

"What makes me racist is my racist views of non-white people! But I didn't even say any of that stuff on the radio last week!"

CEO Larry Antifa Admits Ron Johnson is Right About the Capitol Riot

SOMEWHERE IN LIBTARDIA -- When Sen. Ron Johnson (Q-WI) spoke during a Senate hearing yesterday, he raised quite a few eyebrows. The hearing was, ostensibly, about the January 6th insurrection on the capitol building. Johnson used his time to...

Ivanka: “Why Would Daddy Excite an Erection When He Knows That’s My Job?”

LAKE PARIAH, FLORIDA -- Life after her father left the White House has been quite a roller coaster of emotion for former First Lady Ivanka Trump. Exiled from her social circles after a four year period of using the...

High Energy Alpha Male Too Chickenshit to Testify Under Oath About the Insurrection He Started

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- In the late 1990's President William Jefferson Clinton was ensnared in a political scandal that could have ended his presidency, and his opponents in the Republican Party who controlled the House of Representatives at the time...

Parler Now Being Hosted on Klansman’s Tandy 1000

The alt-right social media app Parler was taken offline when Amazon Web Services canceled their account. It was an action that left thousands of angry, ginned-up, ammo hoarding patriotic Trump supporters feeling alone and increasingly without a safe social...
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God Apologizes For Not Telling Everyone About His Great Replacement Project Sooner

After a white supremacist gunman's killing spree in Buffalo, New York over the weekend revealed the shooter's manifesto included...
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