Saturday, January 22, 2022

Marjorie Taylor Greene

Ever Since My Butthole Started Following MTG on Facebook, It’s Spewed the Dumbest Shit

In hind(end)sight, giving my rectum its own Facebook account has come back to bite me squarely in the ass. Maybe I should have known better, but as you'll see from reading this story, I was really put in quite...

Twitter: MTG Is Allowed One Account Per IQ Point

SWILLY CORN VALLEY, CALIFORNIA -- Last week, Twitter made headlines when it permanently banned the personal account of a sitting congresspony. Citing her repeated posts that spread COVID-19 disinformation, Twitter announced that they had permanently disabled the personal account...

In Hindsight, Crossing Horse, Demon, and Nazi DNA Was Probably a Bad Idea

The following is an excerpt from a new book entitled, "Making a Monster," written by Dr. Benson Hornaydieux of the American Institute of Genetic Research. In his new book, Dr. Hornaydieux reveals some rather earth shattering details about freshman...

Boebert Thought Planning Trump’s Insurrection Just Meant ‘Giving Boners to Some Dirty MAGAs’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Responding to a new bombshell report in Rolling Stone that indicates she participated in a plot to overturn last year's election, freshman Congresswoman Lauren Boebert (Q-CO) tried to bat away, deflect, and downplay the implications of the article. "Yeah,...

No, I’m Not Dressed as Marjorie Taylor Greene for Halloween. I’m Just a Horse.

Look, you'll have to look far and wide for someone who loves Halloween more than I love it. Of all the holidays we celebrate here, Halloween is one of my most favorite! I love the opportunity to become someone...

Boebert and Greene File Articles of Impeachment Against Hunter Biden’s Laptop

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- When Democrats and a handful of vertebrate Republicans impeached Donald Trump twice, Republicans warned that there would be recompense. Today, in a move sure to stir quite a commotion on the Hill, Trump's loyalist struck their...

Greene Volunteers to Help Border Patrol at the Southern Border and Bring Her Own Saddle

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Yesterday, images of border patrol agents on horseback, using reins as whips to corral undocumented immigrants at the southern border blew up the Internet. While those in the pro-law enforcement/fascism camp have defended the agents, noting...

Greene Vows to ‘Destroy’ Tech Companies That Hand Over Records By Making Donald Trump Their CEO

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- This week, Congressional Republicans once more found themselves worked into a lather over the failed insurrection of January 6th. That day, a violent mob of pro-MAGA, pro-Trump Republican voters, urged on by weeks of baseless allegations...

Greene Demands an Update From the FDA on Approval of Bleach and Sunlight Injections

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- After months of waiting, the Food and Drug Administration finally gave its full approval to Pfizer's COVID-19 vaccine. However, for some that isn't good enough, and the FDA needs to also rush its approval of other...

VP Harris Thanks Congressional Republicans For Endorsing Her Future Presidency

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- These days, it's tough to throw a rock in the nation's capital and not hit a Republican demanding that Joe Biden be impeached over his administration's handling of the withdrawal of U.S. troops from Afghanistan. Despite...
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Matt Walsh is Thinking Very Deeply About Your Genitals. Just Like Jesus.

This week, Daily Caller columnist and podcaster Matt Walsh -- a devout evangelical Christian conservative -- appeared on The Dr. Phil...
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