Wednesday, May 31, 2023

Supreme Court

Jesus Can’t Figure Out Why American Christians Want to Starve Children They Force Into Life

Speaking to reporters at his weekly press conference, Jesus Hubert Christ was asked for his opinions on a leaked Supreme Court opinion indicating the conservative majority is poised to overturn Roe Vs Wade. Christ reiterated that he, as a general...

We Have Our First Black Female Supreme Court Justice, But When Will It Be a White Man’s Turn?

The following editorial was submitted to this outlet by Dick Richardson, a conservative podcaster. The views and opinions expressed herein are those of Mr. Richardson, and do not necessarily reflect those of this outlet, its ownership, or staff.  While the...

Amy Coney Barrett Says She’ll Welcome Jackson to Supreme Court If Mr. Barrett Says She Can

If Judge Ketanji Brown Jackson is confirmed by the U.S. Senate and becomes a member of the United States Supreme Court, she'll be welcomed by the previously most recently appointed woman to the high court. That is, of course,...

Supreme Court To Carefully Consider Pros, Cons Of Forcing Teens to Have Fathers’ Rape Babies

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- For the first time in decades, the United States Supreme Court will hear oral arguments this morning in a case that could have a transformative effect on abortion rights in America. Since 1973, every woman living in...

In The Interest of Bipartisanship, Manchin Supports McConnell Blocking Biden’s SCOTUS Nominees

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Surprising literally no one, Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (Q-Moscow) told reporters today that if the Republicans retake control of the Senate in next year's midterms, he will block any Supreme Court nominees put forth by...

TX Governor Signs Law Affirming Life Begins at Erection

AUSTIN, TEXAS -- Gov. Greg Abbott (Q-TX) signed a law today that makes seeking or obtaining an abortion after the point of erection illegal. "It is with great pride, and a solemn commitment to protecting the life of the unborn...

Cruz: Dems ‘Aren’t Entitled’ to Supreme Court Majority ‘Just Because They’re the Majority’

"Do they think their democracy should be representative of their demographics?"

Trump Tells Supreme Court He ‘Really, Really, Really WANTED to Be President Again’

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Throughout his presidency, there has been one word used almost incessantly about Donald Trump's approach to, well, everything. That word is "unprecedented." For many over the past four years, it's become apparent why so many things...

Trump Legal Team Wants to Wrap Entire Supreme Court in Tinfoil Before Presenting Their Arguments

It's not exactly been a big secret. The Trump Campaign's legal strategy has always been to get one or more of their longshot bids to overturn the will of the people before the Supreme Court of the United States...

Trump Asks SCOTUS to Force States to Count Votes Using Three-Fifths Compromise

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- The failing Donald Trump re-election campaign has filed an emergency motion with the Supreme Court of the United States of America, asking the highest court in the country to dictate to all fifty states how to...
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God Apologizes For Not Telling Everyone About His Great Replacement Project Sooner

After a white supremacist gunman's killing spree in Buffalo, New York over the weekend revealed the shooter's manifesto included...
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