Saturday, October 1, 2022

war on christmas

Pentagon Tells Trump U.S. Armed Forces ‘Can’t Afford’ Two-Front War on Christmas and Thanksgiving

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Though today is Thanksgiving, it's not a day off for everyone, especially the U.S. Armed Forces. Which is why in the early hours of this morning, the Pentagon prepared a brief for President Donald J. Trump,...

Trump Signs Treaty With Obama, Officially Ending War on Christmas

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- It's a day that many in this country thought would never come, but nevertheless has arrived and given all Americans hope for the emergence of a new day, the dawning of a new era as with...

Man Strikes First Blow in War on Christmas Putting Up His Lights on Halloween

CENTRAL VALLEY, CALIFORNIA -- Inspired by President Donald Trump's repeated rhetoric, including a 2017 speech at the Value Voters Summit yesterday, Kevin Palumbo went to his garage this morning, grabbed his ten foot ladder, and all sixteen boxes of...

Hellraiser Holiday Starbucks Cup Sends Area Woman to Hell

Sparks, NV -- 31-year-old Dawn Qualls found herself in the torturous and fiery pits of Hell over the weekend after ordering a Starbucks limited edition Holiday Hellraiser Carmel Machiatto. Ms. Qualls, who works in guest services at the neighboring Silver...
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God Apologizes For Not Telling Everyone About His Great Replacement Project Sooner

After a white supremacist gunman's killing spree in Buffalo, New York over the weekend revealed the shooter's manifesto included...
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